Breaking up is not something to be taken lightly. It could be the best idea or it could be something you live to regret.
Regrettably, my bad relationships have always lasted longer than they should have. If there is trouble in a relationship, I should “work harder” at it rather than take a step back. If you are questioning your reasons for being in a relationship its time to recognize a sinking ship and get out before it’s too late.
#1. He is cheating on you.
The most obvious sign that it’s time to break up is if he is cheating on you. Cheating is crossing the line and once that line is crossed, the trust is broken and it is very hard to get it back. Staying with a cheating man means you accept disrespectful behaviour. With such a spouse you will always feel “not good enough” and this always ends up affecting all other parts of your life in a negative way and without consequences, a man will always cheat again. Shante Broadus, Snoop’s wife of twenty years most recently posted on her Instagram. It read, “Don’t ask me for relationship advice cuz I took the n*gga back 81 times.”
Are you prepared to be cheated on 81 times
#2. If he lacks a game plan
If he uses “I” instead of “we” when he talks about the future. It’s a hint. He sees you as temporary rather than a fixed pillar in his life. Rather than frustrating yourself further, start living and making your own plans. Create your own world where the version of yourself to attract a great man who does see you as his long term future plan.
#3 He’s an addict
Erratic moods, financial trouble, unable to hold down a job, neglect of responsibilities, unhealthy friendships, these are just a few signs of an addict. This another deal-breaker that is hard to swallow. Addiction rears its ugly head when you are in too deep. Addicts are extremely good liars. When you are in such a relationship it is emotionally exhausting when you are constantly playing the role of girlfriend policeman. It’s hard to walk away from your partner because you feel guilty but an addict can only recover when he hits rock bottom.Being with him only enables his behaviour, you’ll truly be helping yourself and him if you break up with him.
#4 Any form of abuse
If your partner tries to control, bully, frighten or isolate you it is some form of abuse. It can be verbal, mental, physical or emotional. The more you stay in such a relationship the more you lose yourself. Abuse is never your fault. You “did not ask for it”. Don’t wait until someone violently throws you down the stairs and tries to cover up your murder to get out of abusive relationship.
#5 If you are cheating or tempted to cheat
Loneliness, boredom, trying to fill an emotional void in our lives…sadly more and more women are cheating. No data would give valid statistics because we are very good at hiding it. However the emotional and financial toll (if you are married) its still a bad idea. If you are cheating, its a clear sign to step back and work on yourself.
Your relationship can never really be perfect. There will always be a few irritations and it is certainly unrealistic to think you will not be happy all the time, however, learn to trust your gut instinct, set boundaries and know when it’s time to walk away. This life is short, we all deserve to be in a happy and to be in a happy, healthy relationship.
What made you break up with your partner?
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